Sunday, 31 January 2010

That'll Be All

Hello young ones,

I have final notice, I'm shutting down my blog. It's been long in the coming and I see no incentive to keep it up, particularly since I've lost all my readers.
Lead unhealthy lives and disturb your twisted minds.

That'll be all.



Chalk Faces

Words you can use to describe the following- purple, verbose, forced and downright banal.

Reasons apathy is my only response to your wailing- My plan for fluff blogging didn't work out and I haven't much else to put up here for your amusement and/or agonizing dragging death. Also, I haven't indulged my sadism in a long while.


Downward curls and upward angles

A facile face, commonly discernible.

With a slight twitch and a wayward glance

The mighty sight moves off to perchance.

A glint and sigh with a bashful grin

Another simple one, identified without hint.

Toss a sneer and a muddle wave

You’ll have a splendidly confused daze.

Stoic stare, murmured immutability

Uncertainty unsure in perpetuity.

Off cadence breath or wavering peek

Works of comprehension clearly you seek.


Friday, 8 January 2010

Gods and Grand Games

According to this highly reliable website, tomorrow is Play God Day.

I shall be taking on the role in full responsibility and engaging in all the barbarically holy crimes I am obligated to. So as to be a secular God, I have carefully analyzed all the possible deeds I could accomplish in a day and concluded on the following which I hope will satisfy believers of all faiths.

"If I could be God for a day, I would..." (commanding thee to imagine an innocent childlike voice of such high pitch, that you will be eager to claw your eyeballs out), "commit a few genocides, a couple of sexist acts, some good ol’ confusing reincarnations in the form of my son and myself and not to forget, just some frightful yelling that makes cows and chickens swap personalities just so they can each be severely disappointed. Also, like the original one, I’ll be demanding the first borns of every living being on earth. I likes me some infant toenails."